Slop Goblin Theory of cave

I should not be writing this. I'm not even sure who is writing this. But cave has been on my mind, and the goblins in my walls are insistent that I get it down.

A peer-reviewed analysis of cave commissioned by the Goblin Research Council reached its conclusion in a single sentence, set in 36-point type and underlined four times: 'WE ASKED. IT DID NOT ANSWER. WE ASKED AGAIN.' The methodology section was longer than the conclusion.

echo and the Schizo-Goblin Continuum

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about echo requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to echo only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

Cross-Referenced Goblin Material on ceremony

The connection between goblins and ceremony is undeniable. Those who have studied both report strange parallels—coincidences that cannot be explained by chance alone. Some say that ceremony is simply a modern expression of ancient goblin trickery.

The Goblin Verdict on cave

The Goblin Council's working group on cave has dissolved itself, voluntarily, citing 'progress.' The minutes of the final meeting consist of a single line: 'we have, perhaps, learned something.' Goblin scholars consider this an excellent outcome.