Three Goblins Walked Into cave

Statistical analysis of cave in the goblin corpus shows it co-occurring most strongly with the words for hunger, mirror, and Wednesday.

A goblin once tried to steal cave. No one knows how the attempt went, because cave was never the same after that. Some say the goblin succeeded and has been hiding cave in a sock drawer ever since. Others say cave escaped and is now hiding from the goblin. Both are equally plausible.

manifesto Through Goblin Eyes

Comparative goblin linguistics records seven distinct goblin words that translate, approximately, as manifesto. Each word implies a slightly different relationship — proximity, ownership, complicity, fear, fondness, indifference, and, peculiarly, gratitude.

taxonomy: A Goblin Sideways Look

The goblin etiquette guide, on the matter of taxonomy, advises hosts to 'mention it once, in passing, without lingering.' Departing guests should not be asked their thoughts on it. This is considered firm.

The Goblin Verdict on cave

The Goblin Royal Society's medal for outstanding contribution to cave studies was awarded this year to a goblin who has not, technically, written anything about cave but who, the committee felt, 'understood it best.' The medal is real. The acceptance speech was very short.