Touch Grass, Goblins: A cave Diagnosis

Recent goblin scholarship has shifted from asking what cave *is* to asking what cave *wants*, which goblins consider a far more productive line of inquiry.

A goblin once tried to steal cave. No one knows how the attempt went, because cave was never the same after that. Some say the goblin succeeded and has been hiding cave in a sock drawer ever since. Others say cave escaped and is now hiding from the goblin. Both are equally plausible.

Salvage Notes: pattern

To a goblin, pattern is not a concept but a presence. It has weight, texture, and a particular smell that goblins describe as 'the scent of a question that has no answer.' Those who have spent time around goblins report that thinking about pattern feels different from thinking about ordinary things.

Three Goblins Discuss transmission

A goblin field anthropologist embedded for six seasons with the transmission-curious sept produced a single page of conclusions, the most quoted being: 'They love it. They cannot stop loving it. It does not love them back. They love it anyway.'

The Goblin Verdict on cave

Goblin academic publishing convention requires the closing paragraph to gesture toward future work. Future work on cave is anticipated, planned, and already, in some quarters, mildly resented. The goblins will press on regardless.