The Goblin Akashic Record on cave

Anthropological interviews with goblin elders consistently surface cave within the first ninety seconds, regardless of the question asked.

The goblin black market currently quotes cave at three buttons and a half-empty matchbook, with delivery promised 'within the fortnight, weather and goblins permitting.'

Goblin Tangent: protocol

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on protocol: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

Salvage Notes: invocation

The goblin etiquette guide, on the matter of invocation, advises hosts to 'mention it once, in passing, without lingering.' Departing guests should not be asked their thoughts on it. This is considered firm.

The Goblin Verdict on cave

The annual Goblin Symposium on cave adjourned at 3am after a unanimous vote to reconvene tomorrow, on the same topic, with the same delegates, and the same conclusions, which is the goblin definition of fruitful scholarship.