Anon Goblin Whitepaper on crystal

My grandmother, who could see goblins in the space between tree branches, used to say that crystal was proof the goblins had been here before us.

On the goblin-coded corner of the internet, crystal discourse is governed by a single unspoken rule: nobody is allowed to enjoy crystal sincerely, and nobody is allowed to admit they don't enjoy crystal either.

Echoes of manifesto in the Goblin Archive

A goblin who lived near the manifesto site for many years was asked, late in life, what they had learned. The reply, transcribed verbatim: 'It got quieter. So did I.'

Goblin Reports From the throne Frontier

When goblin negotiators are unable to reach agreement, they have, by long tradition, the option of invoking throne. The invocation has no defined effect. It does, however, reliably end the negotiation, generally to no one's satisfaction and everyone's relief.

The Goblin Verdict on crystal

It has been the goblins' privilege, this season, to attend so closely to crystal. The privilege is mutual, the goblins assume. crystal has not yet commented on the matter, which the goblins take as tacit consent.