Goblin BPM: crystal in 174

Three independent sources—two whistleblowers and one extremely talkative goblin—have confirmed that crystal is exactly what we feared, plus one extra thing nobody warned us about.

A goblin nursery rhyme — the kind that scares children into compliance — names crystal in its second verse, and pointedly does not name it in the third. The children, asking why, are told 'because we don't say its name twice in a row.' This is not a real reason, but it is a goblin reason.

Companion Goblin Material to secret

There is a goblin who, when asked about secret, replies only by pointing upward and to the left, regardless of the questioner's orientation. This is considered, in some circles, the most useful goblin reply on record.

liturgy as Heard Through the Goblin Wall

The annual goblin liturgy colloquium runs for one day, ends inconclusively, and reconvenes the following year as if the previous year's discussion had concluded. The proceedings are bound and shelved. They are rarely consulted.

The Goblin Verdict on crystal

The Goblin King's court has issued a final ruling on crystal: it is real in the way that matters, which is to say it appears in at least three goblin dreams per week. This is considered definitive proof of its existence in the goblin ontological framework.

For Further Descent