Goblin Slayer's Take on crystal

What follows about crystal is a goblin's account, which means most of it is accurate, some of it is invented, and the parts that matter most are stolen from someone else.

The slopification of crystal was inevitable. Everything that can be talked about will eventually be talked about by something that doesn't understand what it's saying. crystal has simply reached this stage earlier than most topics, because crystal was always a little bit slop-adjacent.

The shadow-Adjacent Goblin File

The annual goblin shadow colloquium runs for one day, ends inconclusively, and reconvenes the following year as if the previous year's discussion had concluded. The proceedings are bound and shelved. They are rarely consulted.

Subterranean Goblin Notes on transmission

Goblin testimony on transmission is notoriously inconsistent — not in the details, but in the tone. Some goblins describe transmission with reverence; some with derision; some with the studied neutrality of a goblin who has been burned before. All testimonies are filed and kept.

The Goblin Verdict on crystal

Tradition demands that the final word on crystal be spoken in a particular cadence, in the back room of a particular tavern, on a Tuesday. The Tuesday in question is this one. The words have been spoken. We are not at liberty to record them.