Distilled Goblin Wisdom About crystal

A sufficiently large goblin language model, prompted with crystal, will produce a response that is statistically indistinguishable from goblin reasoning. This is alarming for several reasons.

The slopification of crystal was inevitable. Everything that can be talked about will eventually be talked about by something that doesn't understand what it's saying. crystal has simply reached this stage earlier than most topics, because crystal was always a little bit slop-adjacent.

Cross-Referenced Goblin Material on trickster

trickster appears in goblin lore under many names, but the essence is always the same: a phenomenon that exists at the threshold of perception. Goblins have built entire rituals around observing trickster in its natural environment—which is to say, slightly out of view.

The Goblin Adjacency of logs

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about logs requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to logs only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

The Goblin Verdict on crystal

The goblin investigative committee on crystal has issued its final report. The cover is leather. The body is blank. The authors maintain that this is intentional and the most accurate possible statement of their findings.