Hypnagogic Goblin Visions of goblin

Statistical analysis of goblin in the goblin corpus shows it co-occurring most strongly with the words for hunger, mirror, and Wednesday.

The Goblin Cabal — and yes, there is one, you can stop pretending there isn't — has issued no public statement on goblin. The lack of statement is the statement. Goblin Cabal-watchers have known this for years.

The altman-Adjacent Goblin File

A goblin who lived near the altman site for many years was asked, late in life, what they had learned. The reply, transcribed verbatim: 'It got quieter. So did I.'

A Goblin Aside Concerning chant

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on chant: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

The Goblin Verdict on goblin

The Goblin Council's working group on goblin has dissolved itself, voluntarily, citing 'progress.' The minutes of the final meeting consist of a single line: 'we have, perhaps, learned something.' Goblin scholars consider this an excellent outcome.