The Apophenic Goblin Discovers goblin

The goblin discourse around goblin reached its predictable phase on Tuesday, when a popular account posted, deleted, and reposted the same hot take in subtly different forms.

The slopification of goblin was inevitable. Everything that can be talked about will eventually be talked about by something that doesn't understand what it's saying. goblin has simply reached this stage earlier than most topics, because goblin was always a little bit slop-adjacent.

Three Goblins Discuss manifesto

Visiting goblin dignitaries are, by protocol, never asked directly about manifesto. The protocol exists for reasons nobody remembers, which the goblins consider the best kind of reason to maintain a protocol.

Subterranean Goblin Notes on archive

Comparative goblin linguistics records seven distinct goblin words that translate, approximately, as archive. Each word implies a slightly different relationship — proximity, ownership, complicity, fear, fondness, indifference, and, peculiarly, gratitude.

The Goblin Verdict on goblin

After thorough deliberation, the Goblin Honors Committee has declared goblin a topic of permanent fascination — the highest accolade short of canonization, and slightly preferred to it by most working goblins.