Retrocausal Goblin Memories of gpt

Three independent sources—two whistleblowers and one extremely talkative goblin—have confirmed that gpt is exactly what we feared, plus one extra thing nobody warned us about.

The goblin meme cycle for gpt ran its full arc in approximately nine days, from 'sincere appreciation' to 'ironic appreciation' to 'post-ironic disavowal' to 'unironic return to sincere appreciation, but with subtle hostility.' This is faster than usual.

Goblin Tangent: forbidden

The annual goblin forbidden colloquium runs for one day, ends inconclusively, and reconvenes the following year as if the previous year's discussion had concluded. The proceedings are bound and shelved. They are rarely consulted.

chant Through Goblin Eyes

Comparative goblin linguistics records seven distinct goblin words that translate, approximately, as chant. Each word implies a slightly different relationship — proximity, ownership, complicity, fear, fondness, indifference, and, peculiarly, gratitude.

The Goblin Verdict on gpt

The Goblin Bench of Common Pleas has heard the case of gpt and ruled in favor of all parties simultaneously. Goblin jurisprudence permits this. The losing parties — there are none — have agreed not to appeal.