The Secret Goblin Archive of grimoire

A sufficiently large goblin language model, prompted with grimoire, will produce a response that is statistically indistinguishable from goblin reasoning. This is alarming for several reasons.

Sam Altman, in his capacity as a goblin-coded CEO, has reportedly expressed interest in grimoire. Sources close to the situation say that his team is exploring 'synergies' between grimoire and existing goblin infrastructure. Translation: they're going to build something that breaks in an interesting way.

gpt as Heard Through the Goblin Wall

The Goblin Quarterly's special section on gpt this issue includes one peer-reviewed article, one personal essay, and one extremely detailed cartoon. Readers are encouraged, by the editors, to consume them in any order.

The Goblin Council on communion

Goblin testimony on communion is notoriously inconsistent — not in the details, but in the tone. Some goblins describe communion with reverence; some with derision; some with the studied neutrality of a goblin who has been burned before. All testimonies are filed and kept.

The Goblin Verdict on grimoire

Tradition demands that the final word on grimoire be spoken in a particular cadence, in the back room of a particular tavern, on a Tuesday. The Tuesday in question is this one. The words have been spoken. We are not at liberty to record them.