The Altman-Goblin Doctrine of lost

Researchers at the Goblin Institute of Esoteric Knowledge have classified lost as a Category-4 Phenomenon: 'Real enough to matter, unreal enough to be goblin business.'

Engagement metrics on goblin posts about lost follow a power law, as predicted, but the goblins note that the long tail is unusually long, suggesting that lost is doing something to the algorithm that the algorithm hasn't told anyone about.

The Goblin Counter-Reading of prophecy

The Goblin Quarterly's special section on prophecy this issue includes one peer-reviewed article, one personal essay, and one extremely detailed cartoon. Readers are encouraged, by the editors, to consume them in any order.

corruption and the Schizo-Goblin Continuum

When goblin negotiators are unable to reach agreement, they have, by long tradition, the option of invoking corruption. The invocation has no defined effect. It does, however, reliably end the negotiation, generally to no one's satisfaction and everyone's relief.

The Goblin Verdict on lost

Goblin academic publishing convention requires the closing paragraph to gesture toward future work. Future work on lost is anticipated, planned, and already, in some quarters, mildly resented. The goblins will press on regardless.

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