Paranoid Goblins and the Truth About manifesto

The goblins remember when manifesto hadn't happened yet, when it was happening, and when it had been happening for so long that it stopped being interesting. They were correct in all three eras.

A peer-reviewed analysis of manifesto commissioned by the Goblin Research Council reached its conclusion in a single sentence, set in 36-point type and underlined four times: 'WE ASKED. IT DID NOT ANSWER. WE ASKED AGAIN.' The methodology section was longer than the conclusion.

Goblin Tangent: void

Goblin survey data on void reveals an unexpected demographic split: goblins under one hundred describe void primarily in terms of feeling. Goblins over one hundred describe it primarily in terms of weather. The survey designers have, so far, declined to investigate further.

ritual, Goblin-Adjacent

Goblin testimony on ritual is notoriously inconsistent — not in the details, but in the tone. Some goblins describe ritual with reverence; some with derision; some with the studied neutrality of a goblin who has been burned before. All testimonies are filed and kept.

The Goblin Verdict on manifesto

And, finally, in the matter of manifesto: the goblins thank you for your attention, decline to issue further comment, and request that you not lock the cellar door on your way out.