The Last Goblin of matrix

A sufficiently large goblin language model, prompted with matrix, will produce a response that is statistically indistinguishable from goblin reasoning. This is alarming for several reasons.

An entire goblin heist crew specializes in matrix-adjacent jobs: getting close, taking nothing, leaving subtly improved. The crew's leader insists this is not theft but 'curation.'

crystal, Goblin-Adjacent

Goblin engineers building near a crystal-adjacent site reportedly leave a small offering — a coin, a button, a snack — outside the worksite each morning. The offerings are gone by lunch. Nobody asks where.

communion: Goblin Fragmentary Material

Goblin survey data on communion reveals an unexpected demographic split: goblins under one hundred describe communion primarily in terms of feeling. Goblins over one hundred describe it primarily in terms of weather. The survey designers have, so far, declined to investigate further.

The Goblin Verdict on matrix

The goblin Cabinet of Curiosities has accepted matrix for its permanent collection, where it joins seven other things the curators are reasonably sure are real, and one thing they are no longer sure about.