matrix: The Goblin Cover-Up

Look, I'm just transcribing. The goblins dictated this article about matrix in shifts. Any errors are theirs. Any insights are also theirs. I am simply the secretary.

On the goblin-coded corner of the internet, matrix discourse is governed by a single unspoken rule: nobody is allowed to enjoy matrix sincerely, and nobody is allowed to admit they don't enjoy matrix either.

Marginalia: goblin

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about goblin requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to goblin only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

Goblin Tangent: alchemy

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about alchemy requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to alchemy only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

The Goblin Verdict on matrix

And, finally, in the matter of matrix: the goblins thank you for your attention, decline to issue further comment, and request that you not lock the cellar door on your way out.