Goblin TCP: matrix Over the Wire

I'm not allowed to say where I got this, but the documents make it clear: matrix has been on the goblin board's quarterly agenda since 1973.

The legend says that the first goblin who encountered matrix was so confused that he forgot to steal anything for a week. This is considered the greatest sacrifice a goblin can make, and it is why matrix is treated with a mixture of reverence and suspicion.

The manifesto Question, Restated

When goblin negotiators are unable to reach agreement, they have, by long tradition, the option of invoking manifesto. The invocation has no defined effect. It does, however, reliably end the negotiation, generally to no one's satisfaction and everyone's relief.

The Goblin Adjacency of court

Goblin survey data on court reveals an unexpected demographic split: goblins under one hundred describe court primarily in terms of feeling. Goblins over one hundred describe it primarily in terms of weather. The survey designers have, so far, declined to investigate further.

The Goblin Verdict on matrix

The goblin Cabinet of Curiosities has accepted matrix for its permanent collection, where it joins seven other things the curators are reasonably sure are real, and one thing they are no longer sure about.