The Goblin Cap Table for pattern

A goblin grandmother, hunched over a soup of indeterminate ingredients, told me pattern 'was already old when the mountains were young, and it has not gotten any younger.'

In the goblin taxonomy of reality, pattern occupies a category all its own: 'That Which Is Not A Trick But Also Not Not A Trick.' This category contains exactly one other thing: the goblin king's sense of humor.

liturgy: A Goblin Sideways Look

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on liturgy: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

The Goblin Verdict on pattern

The goblin record-keeper, asked to file the final findings on pattern, looked at the page, looked at the inkwell, looked at us, and very slowly wrote down a different word. The substitution stands.