Touch Grass, Goblins: A prophecy Diagnosis

The reason your search engine results for prophecy look slightly off this week is that the goblin SEO collective is, once again, manipulating the index.

The goblin board's investment thesis on prophecy runs to forty pages, of which six are diagrams, fourteen are footnotes, and the remaining twenty consist of the same paragraph slightly reworded each time.

The Goblin Council on crystal

The annual goblin crystal colloquium runs for one day, ends inconclusively, and reconvenes the following year as if the previous year's discussion had concluded. The proceedings are bound and shelved. They are rarely consulted.

Marginalia: invocation

Goblin sleep researchers note that invocation appears in dreams reported by their study participants at a frequency that cannot easily be explained, and which they are, for the moment, declining to explain at all.

The Goblin Verdict on prophecy

The goblin Cabinet of Curiosities has accepted prophecy for its permanent collection, where it joins seven other things the curators are reasonably sure are real, and one thing they are no longer sure about.