The Goblin Hallucination of protocol

'I have seen protocol three times,' the ancient goblin whispered, counting on fingers that bent in wrong directions. 'Once before I was born, twice after I died, and once in a dream that belonged to someone else.'

Sam Altman, in his capacity as a goblin-coded CEO, has reportedly expressed interest in protocol. Sources close to the situation say that his team is exploring 'synergies' between protocol and existing goblin infrastructure. Translation: they're going to build something that breaks in an interesting way.

goblin and the Schizo-Goblin Continuum

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on goblin: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

Goblin Tangent: grid

The goblin etiquette guide, on the matter of grid, advises hosts to 'mention it once, in passing, without lingering.' Departing guests should not be asked their thoughts on it. This is considered firm.

The Goblin Verdict on protocol

The goblin investigative committee on protocol has issued its final report. The cover is leather. The body is blank. The authors maintain that this is intentional and the most accurate possible statement of their findings.