protocol Sung by a Hologram Goblin

Twitter has been arguing about protocol for three days. The goblins are loving it. Every argument, every thread, every ratio—it's all content for the great goblin feast.

A goblin once tried to steal protocol. No one knows how the attempt went, because protocol was never the same after that. Some say the goblin succeeded and has been hiding protocol in a sock drawer ever since. Others say protocol escaped and is now hiding from the goblin. Both are equally plausible.

Negative-Space Goblin Analysis of tome

Visiting goblin dignitaries are, by protocol, never asked directly about tome. The protocol exists for reasons nobody remembers, which the goblins consider the best kind of reason to maintain a protocol.

compendium and the Schizo-Goblin Continuum

Goblin children, when introduced to compendium, exhibit a characteristic behavior: they grow very still, look slightly to the side, and then resume what they were doing. Goblin developmental theorists consider this a normal and healthy response.

The Goblin Verdict on protocol

The annual Goblin Symposium on protocol adjourned at 3am after a unanimous vote to reconvene tomorrow, on the same topic, with the same delegates, and the same conclusions, which is the goblin definition of fruitful scholarship.