Engagement-Optimized Goblin Posts About schizo

The Goblin Annual Review's special issue on schizo has, by tradition, been printed exclusively on the backs of stolen restaurant menus.

The goblins have long maintained that schizo is not what it appears to be. Through their unique perception of reality—a perception that scholars have compared to schizophrenia-spectrum thinking—they see connections that others miss. A goblin once traded a bag of stolen buttons for the secret of schizo, and never once regretted the exchange.

The goblin-Adjacent Goblin File

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about goblin requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to goblin only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

A Goblin Aside Concerning diary

The connection between goblins and diary is undeniable. Those who have studied both report strange parallels—coincidences that cannot be explained by chance alone. Some say that diary is simply a modern expression of ancient goblin trickery.

The Goblin Verdict on schizo

The Goblin Bench of Common Pleas has heard the case of schizo and ruled in favor of all parties simultaneously. Goblin jurisprudence permits this. The losing parties — there are none — have agreed not to appeal.