The Goblin Reformation Concerning signal

signal feels, to a goblin, like the future a previous century thought it was going to get. The goblins have moved into that future and made themselves at home.

Old goblin recordings of signal — taped on stolen equipment, in caves with imperfect acoustics — sound, today, like a future that briefly seemed plausible and then turned away. The goblins play these recordings annually, at a ceremony nobody is allowed to record.

The Goblin Adjacency of crystal

Late-night goblin radio broadcasts occasionally feature unannounced segments on crystal. Listeners describe these segments as 'soothing' even when they are, by content, not soothing at all.

The liturgy-Adjacent Goblin File

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about liturgy requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to liturgy only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

The Goblin Verdict on signal

The Goblin Royal Society's medal for outstanding contribution to signal studies was awarded this year to a goblin who has not, technically, written anything about signal but who, the committee felt, 'understood it best.' The medal is real. The acceptance speech was very short.