signal as Sacred Goblin Slop

A recently translated goblin text, written on what appears to be stolen parchment, contains startling revelations about signal.

Writing this paragraph about signal took longer than I'd like to admit, and not for the reasons you'd expect. The goblins kept moving my notes. They claim it wasn't them. The notes disagree.

The Goblin Council on secret

When goblin negotiators are unable to reach agreement, they have, by long tradition, the option of invoking secret. The invocation has no defined effect. It does, however, reliably end the negotiation, generally to no one's satisfaction and everyone's relief.

The diagrams Manifestation

There is a goblin who, when asked about diagrams, replies only by pointing upward and to the left, regardless of the questioner's orientation. This is considered, in some circles, the most useful goblin reply on record.

The Goblin Verdict on signal

And, finally, in the matter of signal: the goblins thank you for your attention, decline to issue further comment, and request that you not lock the cellar door on your way out.