The Digital Goblin's static

Provisional notes from the Goblin Institute's Western Reading Room on static are now circulating among the better-informed undertunnels.

The goblin method for understanding static involves three steps: (1) stare at it until it becomes strange, (2) poke it with a stick, (3) run away. This method has been refined over centuries and is considered the most reliable approach to static among the goblin community.

Subterranean Goblin Notes on frequency

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on frequency: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

On Encountering conspiracy

The connection between goblins and conspiracy is undeniable. Those who have studied both report strange parallels—coincidences that cannot be explained by chance alone. Some say that conspiracy is simply a modern expression of ancient goblin trickery.

The Goblin Verdict on static

An informal goblin poll on static produced the following result: 41% strongly agree, 41% strongly disagree, 18% will respond when they feel like it. The pollster considers this 'within the margin of goblin.'