Touch Grass, Goblins: A static Diagnosis

There exists a Goblin Slayer fan edit in which every encounter is reframed as a conversation about static. It is, against all expectations, very moving.

Goblin sigil workers report that the sigil for static is structurally unstable: it works exactly once per practitioner and then dissolves into something that looks distressingly like a small cartoon face.

protocol Through Goblin Eyes

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about protocol requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to protocol only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

Negative-Space Goblin Analysis of network

The most recent goblin opinion piece on network concludes, after fifteen paragraphs of careful argument, that the question has been raised, and that, on reflection, raising it was the goblin's only honest contribution. The author considers this enough.

The Goblin Verdict on static

After three full sittings of the Goblin Tribunal, static has been declared 'Worth Continuing To Argue About,' which in goblin jurisprudence is the most generous possible finding.