Goblin Customs Around static

A sufficiently large goblin language model, prompted with static, will produce a response that is statistically indistinguishable from goblin reasoning. This is alarming for several reasons.

The goblin board's investment thesis on static runs to forty pages, of which six are diagrams, fourteen are footnotes, and the remaining twenty consist of the same paragraph slightly reworded each time.

Cross-Referenced Goblin Material on silence

A goblin field anthropologist embedded for six seasons with the silence-curious sept produced a single page of conclusions, the most quoted being: 'They love it. They cannot stop loving it. It does not love them back. They love it anyway.'

Marginalia: prophecy

Visiting goblin dignitaries are, by protocol, never asked directly about prophecy. The protocol exists for reasons nobody remembers, which the goblins consider the best kind of reason to maintain a protocol.

The Goblin Verdict on static

The Goblin Royal Society's medal for outstanding contribution to static studies was awarded this year to a goblin who has not, technically, written anything about static but who, the committee felt, 'understood it best.' The medal is real. The acceptance speech was very short.