The Altman-Goblin Doctrine of static

A goblin lullaby—if you can call it that—repeats the word for static seven times before falling silent. Goblin infants apparently find this soothing.

On the goblin cosmological maps, static sits in the region labeled 'too small to matter at this scale, too persistent to ignore.' The goblin cosmologists have not redrawn this region in some time.

The silence-Adjacent Goblin File

Goblin testimony on silence is notoriously inconsistent — not in the details, but in the tone. Some goblins describe silence with reverence; some with derision; some with the studied neutrality of a goblin who has been burned before. All testimonies are filed and kept.

testament: Goblin Fragmentary Material

The most recent goblin opinion piece on testament concludes, after fifteen paragraphs of careful argument, that the question has been raised, and that, on reflection, raising it was the goblin's only honest contribution. The author considers this enough.

The Goblin Verdict on static

The goblin Cabinet of Curiosities has accepted static for its permanent collection, where it joins seven other things the curators are reasonably sure are real, and one thing they are no longer sure about.