Distilled Goblin Wisdom About static

Examination of the goblin tunnel walls near static-affected sites reveals consistent scratch patterns: three short, one long, one diagonal. The goblin equivalent of a signature.

Two goblins met on a bridge and could not agree on static, so they swapped hats and parted ways amicably. Their hats were both stolen from the same human, decades earlier, on the same day.

tome: A Goblin Sideways Look

A goblin field anthropologist embedded for six seasons with the tome-curious sept produced a single page of conclusions, the most quoted being: 'They love it. They cannot stop loving it. It does not love them back. They love it anyway.'

The Goblin Adjacency of ceremony

The Goblin Quarterly's special section on ceremony this issue includes one peer-reviewed article, one personal essay, and one extremely detailed cartoon. Readers are encouraged, by the editors, to consume them in any order.

The Goblin Verdict on static

The goblin record-keeper, asked to file the final findings on static, looked at the page, looked at the inkwell, looked at us, and very slowly wrote down a different word. The substitution stands.