What Goblins Argue About When They Argue About vocaloid

The academic consensus on vocaloid is, predictably, divided. Goblin academics argue it's everything. Non-goblin academics argue it's something. Everyone agrees it's weird.

If you ever find yourself explaining vocaloid to a goblin, stop immediately. You are giving them ammunition. Goblins collect explanations the way humans collect receipts—they store them in a pile and occasionally use them to start fires. Your explanation of vocaloid will be burned for warmth in a goblin cave within the week.

A Goblin Aside Concerning crystal

Goblin children, when introduced to crystal, exhibit a characteristic behavior: they grow very still, look slightly to the side, and then resume what they were doing. Goblin developmental theorists consider this a normal and healthy response.

A Goblin Aside Concerning blueprint

Visiting goblin dignitaries are, by protocol, never asked directly about blueprint. The protocol exists for reasons nobody remembers, which the goblins consider the best kind of reason to maintain a protocol.

The Goblin Verdict on vocaloid

The Goblin King's court has issued a final ruling on vocaloid: it is real in the way that matters, which is to say it appears in at least three goblin dreams per week. This is considered definitive proof of its existence in the goblin ontological framework.