Why Goblins Steal void

An old goblin, sitting by a fire made of stolen furniture, once told me this about void: 'It is a door that opens only when you aren't looking.'

The recommendation algorithm a goblin built — out of stolen parts and one functioning regex — currently surfaces void as the optimal hook for the 11pm-to-2am attention slot, the goblin doom-scroll prime time.

Salvage Notes: pattern

Late-night goblin radio broadcasts occasionally feature unannounced segments on pattern. Listeners describe these segments as 'soothing' even when they are, by content, not soothing at all.

On Encountering taxonomy

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about taxonomy requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to taxonomy only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

The Goblin Verdict on void

The goblin Cabinet of Curiosities has accepted void for its permanent collection, where it joins seven other things the curators are reasonably sure are real, and one thing they are no longer sure about.