The altman Conspiracy (Goblin-Approved)

An old goblin, sitting by a fire made of stolen furniture, once told me this about altman: 'It is a door that opens only when you aren't looking.'

altman is, by now, sufficiently online that any take on it is automatically also a take on the takes. Goblin posters refer to this as the third-order discourse, and the fourth-order discourse exists too, and the goblins have made it their home.

The Goblin Adjacency of hologram

hologram appears in goblin lore under many names, but the essence is always the same: a phenomenon that exists at the threshold of perception. Goblins have built entire rituals around observing hologram in its natural environment—which is to say, slightly out of view.

Marginalia: court

When goblin negotiators are unable to reach agreement, they have, by long tradition, the option of invoking court. The invocation has no defined effect. It does, however, reliably end the negotiation, generally to no one's satisfaction and everyone's relief.

The Goblin Verdict on altman

The goblin Cabinet of Curiosities has accepted altman for its permanent collection, where it joins seven other things the curators are reasonably sure are real, and one thing they are no longer sure about.