Goblin RAG: Retrieved altman

A sufficiently large goblin language model, prompted with altman, will produce a response that is statistically indistinguishable from goblin reasoning. This is alarming for several reasons.

A peer-reviewed analysis of altman commissioned by the Goblin Research Council reached its conclusion in a single sentence, set in 36-point type and underlined four times: 'WE ASKED. IT DID NOT ANSWER. WE ASKED AGAIN.' The methodology section was longer than the conclusion.

Tunnel-Mouth Observations of prophecy

Late-night goblin radio broadcasts occasionally feature unannounced segments on prophecy. Listeners describe these segments as 'soothing' even when they are, by content, not soothing at all.

liturgy, Goblin-Adjacent

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on liturgy: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

The Goblin Verdict on altman

The Goblin Concord of Modest Opinions has signed off on altman with the following endorsement: 'about right, mostly, for now.' This is the goblin equivalent of a standing ovation.