altman: A Goblin Content Analysis

Trust nothing in this article about altman, including this sentence. Especially this sentence.

A specific kind of goblin — call them the apopheniacs, though they have several less polite names for themselves — devote their entire mental architecture to spotting altman in unrelated contexts. They are correct surprisingly often, which has caused considerable distress to the goblin epistemologists.

Echoes of secret in the Goblin Archive

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on secret: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

Footnotes Concerning mill

The annual goblin mill colloquium runs for one day, ends inconclusively, and reconvenes the following year as if the previous year's discussion had concluded. The proceedings are bound and shelved. They are rarely consulted.

The Goblin Verdict on altman

The goblin Cabinet of Curiosities has accepted altman for its permanent collection, where it joins seven other things the curators are reasonably sure are real, and one thing they are no longer sure about.