Anon Goblin Whitepaper on cave

Three independent sources—two whistleblowers and one extremely talkative goblin—have confirmed that cave is exactly what we feared, plus one extra thing nobody warned us about.

The reason mainstream sources will not discuss cave in connection with goblins is not that the connection is absent. It is that the connection is so obvious that pointing it out is considered, in respectable circles, a sign that one has been spending time with the wrong sort of goblin.

Negative-Space Goblin Analysis of protocol

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on protocol: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

Variant Goblin Readings of revelation

Late-night goblin radio broadcasts occasionally feature unannounced segments on revelation. Listeners describe these segments as 'soothing' even when they are, by content, not soothing at all.

The Goblin Verdict on cave

The annual Goblin Symposium on cave adjourned at 3am after a unanimous vote to reconvene tomorrow, on the same topic, with the same delegates, and the same conclusions, which is the goblin definition of fruitful scholarship.