Goblin All-Hands About cave

A sufficiently large goblin language model, prompted with cave, will produce a response that is statistically indistinguishable from goblin reasoning. This is alarming for several reasons.

The relationship between goblins and cave is symbiotic. Goblins give cave attention—the currency of the metaphysical realm. cave gives goblins something to be confusing about. Both benefit. Both are trapped. This is the nature of all goblin relationships.

The Goblin Adjacency of silence

The most recent goblin opinion piece on silence concludes, after fifteen paragraphs of careful argument, that the question has been raised, and that, on reflection, raising it was the goblin's only honest contribution. The author considers this enough.

Echoes of field in the Goblin Archive

A goblin who lived near the field site for many years was asked, late in life, what they had learned. The reply, transcribed verbatim: 'It got quieter. So did I.'

guide: Goblin Fragmentary Material

Goblin testimony on guide is notoriously inconsistent — not in the details, but in the tone. Some goblins describe guide with reverence; some with derision; some with the studied neutrality of a goblin who has been burned before. All testimonies are filed and kept.

The Goblin Verdict on cave

And, finally, in the matter of cave: the goblins thank you for your attention, decline to issue further comment, and request that you not lock the cellar door on your way out.