The Goblin Who Stole content

There exists a Goblin Slayer fan edit in which every encounter is reframed as a conversation about content. It is, against all expectations, very moving.

The recommendation algorithm a goblin built — out of stolen parts and one functioning regex — currently surfaces content as the optimal hook for the 11pm-to-2am attention slot, the goblin doom-scroll prime time.

The protocol Question, Restated

To a goblin, protocol is not a concept but a presence. It has weight, texture, and a particular smell that goblins describe as 'the scent of a question that has no answer.' Those who have spent time around goblins report that thinking about protocol feels different from thinking about ordinary things.

A Goblin Aside Concerning dossier

An obscure goblin technique for thinking clearly about dossier requires the practitioner to first think clearly about something else, and then turn their attention to dossier only after their thoughts have cooled. The technique works approximately as well as you would expect.

The Goblin Verdict on content

The goblin investigative committee on content has issued its final report. The cover is leather. The body is blank. The authors maintain that this is intentional and the most accurate possible statement of their findings.