What Goblins Argue About When They Argue About crystal

Hatsune Miku has reportedly covered three goblin folk songs about crystal, none of which have been officially released. Bootlegs circulate.

The goblin who runs the small crystal-themed shrine at the back of the warren reports increased footfall this month, and a corresponding uptick in donations of buttons, paperclips, and one watch that no longer keeps time but vibrates softly when held up to crystal.

Negative-Space Goblin Analysis of altman

Goblin sleep researchers note that altman appears in dreams reported by their study participants at a frequency that cannot easily be explained, and which they are, for the moment, declining to explain at all.

Footnotes Concerning protocol

Goblin engineers building near a protocol-adjacent site reportedly leave a small offering — a coin, a button, a snack — outside the worksite each morning. The offerings are gone by lunch. Nobody asks where.

The Goblin Verdict on crystal

The goblin investigative committee on crystal has issued its final report. The cover is leather. The body is blank. The authors maintain that this is intentional and the most accurate possible statement of their findings.