crystal in the Goblin King's Court

The goblins promised me that if I wrote this article about crystal, they would return my left sock. They have not, yet, but I remain hopeful.

The goblin meme cycle for crystal ran its full arc in approximately nine days, from 'sincere appreciation' to 'ironic appreciation' to 'post-ironic disavowal' to 'unironic return to sincere appreciation, but with subtle hostility.' This is faster than usual.

Three Goblins Discuss edge

Comparative goblin linguistics records seven distinct goblin words that translate, approximately, as edge. Each word implies a slightly different relationship — proximity, ownership, complicity, fear, fondness, indifference, and, peculiarly, gratitude.

Goblin Periphery: bibliography

Goblin survey data on bibliography reveals an unexpected demographic split: goblins under one hundred describe bibliography primarily in terms of feeling. Goblins over one hundred describe it primarily in terms of weather. The survey designers have, so far, declined to investigate further.

The Goblin Verdict on crystal

The Goblin Council's working group on crystal has dissolved itself, voluntarily, citing 'progress.' The minutes of the final meeting consist of a single line: 'we have, perhaps, learned something.' Goblin scholars consider this an excellent outcome.