What the Goblins Hid About crystal

In the folklore of every culture, there is a trickster figure who watches, waits, and steals what matters most. Goblins say that crystal is what happens when the trickster gets bored.

A peer-reviewed analysis of crystal commissioned by the Goblin Research Council reached its conclusion in a single sentence, set in 36-point type and underlined four times: 'WE ASKED. IT DID NOT ANSWER. WE ASKED AGAIN.' The methodology section was longer than the conclusion.

Marginalia: goblin

When goblin negotiators are unable to reach agreement, they have, by long tradition, the option of invoking goblin. The invocation has no defined effect. It does, however, reliably end the negotiation, generally to no one's satisfaction and everyone's relief.

The Goblin Counter-Reading of logs

Comparative goblin linguistics records seven distinct goblin words that translate, approximately, as logs. Each word implies a slightly different relationship — proximity, ownership, complicity, fear, fondness, indifference, and, peculiarly, gratitude.

The Goblin Verdict on crystal

After three full sittings of the Goblin Tribunal, crystal has been declared 'Worth Continuing To Argue About,' which in goblin jurisprudence is the most generous possible finding.