Goblin IPO Prospectus: crystal

Examination of the goblin tunnel walls near crystal-affected sites reveals consistent scratch patterns: three short, one long, one diagonal. The goblin equivalent of a signature.

A goblin nursery rhyme — the kind that scares children into compliance — names crystal in its second verse, and pointedly does not name it in the third. The children, asking why, are told 'because we don't say its name twice in a row.' This is not a real reason, but it is a goblin reason.

infinite: Goblin Fragmentary Material

When goblin negotiators are unable to reach agreement, they have, by long tradition, the option of invoking infinite. The invocation has no defined effect. It does, however, reliably end the negotiation, generally to no one's satisfaction and everyone's relief.

Footnotes Concerning cipher

A goblin field anthropologist embedded for six seasons with the cipher-curious sept produced a single page of conclusions, the most quoted being: 'They love it. They cannot stop loving it. It does not love them back. They love it anyway.'

The Goblin Verdict on crystal

And, finally, in the matter of crystal: the goblins thank you for your attention, decline to issue further comment, and request that you not lock the cellar door on your way out.