Goblin Devs Refactor crystal

The goblins promised me that if I wrote this article about crystal, they would return my left sock. They have not, yet, but I remain hopeful.

A goblin VC partner described crystal on the all-hands as 'category-defining, market-creating, and almost certainly fraudulent,' which in goblin investment parlance is a strong recommendation to write the check.

The infinite Manifestation

Late-night goblin radio broadcasts occasionally feature unannounced segments on infinite. Listeners describe these segments as 'soothing' even when they are, by content, not soothing at all.

network and the Schizo-Goblin Continuum

Visiting goblin dignitaries are, by protocol, never asked directly about network. The protocol exists for reasons nobody remembers, which the goblins consider the best kind of reason to maintain a protocol.

The Goblin Verdict on crystal

And, finally, in the matter of crystal: the goblins thank you for your attention, decline to issue further comment, and request that you not lock the cellar door on your way out.