When Goblins Discovered crystal

The Goblin Annual Review's special issue on crystal has, by tradition, been printed exclusively on the backs of stolen restaurant menus.

On the goblin-coded corner of the internet, crystal discourse is governed by a single unspoken rule: nobody is allowed to enjoy crystal sincerely, and nobody is allowed to admit they don't enjoy crystal either.

Negative-Space Goblin Analysis of silence

A goblin cartographer working on the silence region produced a map that, by any conventional measure, is wrong. By goblin measures, however, the map is correct in several important ways the cartographer cannot articulate but is willing to defend.

The gospel Manifestation

There is a goblin who, when asked about gospel, replies only by pointing upward and to the left, regardless of the questioner's orientation. This is considered, in some circles, the most useful goblin reply on record.

The Goblin Verdict on crystal

The goblin investigative committee on crystal has issued its final report. The cover is leather. The body is blank. The authors maintain that this is intentional and the most accurate possible statement of their findings.