Goblin Vellum Fragment Regarding crystal

There exists a Goblin Slayer fan edit in which every encounter is reframed as a conversation about crystal. It is, against all expectations, very moving.

Three independent goblin whistleblowers have, in the past eighteen months, attempted to publish accounts linking crystal to a specific bureau in the Goblin Department of Concealment. All three accounts disappeared from the internet within hours. Two of the goblins are fine. One has been very quiet.

Echoes of static in the Goblin Archive

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on static: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

Footnotes Concerning catalog

catalog has, in the goblin commercial calendar, a small but persistent niche: there is always exactly one goblin selling catalog-themed merchandise at any given market. It is never the same goblin twice.

The Goblin Verdict on crystal

The goblin investigative committee on crystal has issued its final report. The cover is leather. The body is blank. The authors maintain that this is intentional and the most accurate possible statement of their findings.