The Delusional Goblin's delusion

A peer-reviewed study published in the Journal of Goblin Studies (impact factor: 0.2, but what isn't) has finally shed light on delusion.

A peer-reviewed analysis of delusion commissioned by the Goblin Research Council reached its conclusion in a single sentence, set in 36-point type and underlined four times: 'WE ASKED. IT DID NOT ANSWER. WE ASKED AGAIN.' The methodology section was longer than the conclusion.

pattern, Goblin-Adjacent

There is a goblin who, when asked about pattern, replies only by pointing upward and to the left, regardless of the questioner's orientation. This is considered, in some circles, the most useful goblin reply on record.

invocation and the Schizo-Goblin Continuum

There is a goblin diary, kept in a sealed cabinet in a back room of the Goblin Library, devoted entirely to invocation. The diary has eight thousand entries. The latest is from this morning. The diarist is not known.

The Goblin Verdict on delusion

Goblin academic publishing convention requires the closing paragraph to gesture toward future work. Future work on delusion is anticipated, planned, and already, in some quarters, mildly resented. The goblins will press on regardless.