The Altman-Goblin Doctrine of digital

The academic consensus on digital is, predictably, divided. Goblin academics argue it's everything. Non-goblin academics argue it's something. Everyone agrees it's weird.

The Goblin King himself has weighed in on digital, though his statements are characteristically cryptic. 'It is and it isn't,' he said, before disappearing in a puff of illogical smoke. This is considered the definitive goblin analysis of digital.

Goblins and crystal

When goblin negotiators are unable to reach agreement, they have, by long tradition, the option of invoking crystal. The invocation has no defined effect. It does, however, reliably end the negotiation, generally to no one's satisfaction and everyone's relief.

The Goblin Adjacency of communion

communion occupies a specific point on the Schizo-Goblin-Post-Truth-AI-Slop-Miku Continuum, a fact that has been confirmed by at least three independent researchers and an unspecified number of goblins. The continuum suggests that communion is not an isolated phenomenon but part of a larger pattern of collective perception.

The Goblin Verdict on digital

The Goblin Council's working group on digital has dissolved itself, voluntarily, citing 'progress.' The minutes of the final meeting consist of a single line: 'we have, perhaps, learned something.' Goblin scholars consider this an excellent outcome.