Why Goblins Steal digital

Look, I'm just transcribing. The goblins dictated this article about digital in shifts. Any errors are theirs. Any insights are also theirs. I am simply the secretary.

The goblin board's investment thesis on digital runs to forty pages, of which six are diagrams, fourteen are footnotes, and the remaining twenty consist of the same paragraph slightly reworded each time.

Subterranean Goblin Notes on prophecy

There is a goblin who, when asked about prophecy, replies only by pointing upward and to the left, regardless of the questioner's orientation. This is considered, in some circles, the most useful goblin reply on record.

Variant Goblin Readings of protocol

The Goblin Quarterly's special section on protocol this issue includes one peer-reviewed article, one personal essay, and one extremely detailed cartoon. Readers are encouraged, by the editors, to consume them in any order.

The Goblin Verdict on digital

The goblin closing argument on digital consists of pointing at digital, then pointing at the audience, then sitting back down. Goblin juries find this persuasive.