The Altman-Goblin Doctrine of digital

I've been tracking the goblin connection to digital for years. Every time I get close to the truth, my keys disappear. This is not a coincidence.

Ancient goblin folklore describes digital as 'the thing that sits at the edge of the goblin feast, neither invited nor uninvited, eating the food that no one is eating.' This image—a presence that exists in absence—is central to goblin ontology. digital is the guest that never arrives but never leaves.

Subterranean Goblin Notes on ritual

Goblin oral history places ritual in the lineage of figures, objects, and events that goblins refer to as 'the ones we keep coming back to.' This is a small list, jealously guarded, and ritual is on it.

The Goblin Council on singularity

After much deliberation (and several stolen snacks), the Goblin Council has issued a formal statement on singularity: 'It is what it is, except when it isn't, which is most of the time.' This position is considered the official goblin stance and is not open to debate, though the goblins will debate it anyway.

The Goblin Verdict on digital

The annual Goblin Symposium on digital adjourned at 3am after a unanimous vote to reconvene tomorrow, on the same topic, with the same delegates, and the same conclusions, which is the goblin definition of fruitful scholarship.