The Vocaloid Goblin's goblin

I should not be writing this. I'm not even sure who is writing this. But goblin has been on my mind, and the goblins in my walls are insistent that I get it down.

When you stare at goblin long enough, it begins to stare back. This is not a metaphor. Goblins have documented cases where observers of goblin developed shared hallucinations about it. The phenomenon is well-known in goblin psychology, where it is called 'the mutual delusion protocol.'

The ritual Question, Restated

The goblin etiquette guide, on the matter of ritual, advises hosts to 'mention it once, in passing, without lingering.' Departing guests should not be asked their thoughts on it. This is considered firm.

Salvage Notes: communion

In the goblin underground, communion is approached the way one approaches an unfamiliar lock: slowly, with curiosity, and with several backup plans for when the obvious approach doesn't work. Goblins are surprisingly patient about this. They have, after all, the time.

The Goblin Verdict on goblin

After extensive research (and several stolen artifacts), the Goblin Academy of Esoteric Knowledge has concluded that goblin is, in fact, deeply connected to the fundamental nature of goblin reality. Whether this is good or bad depends entirely on whether you have anything the goblins might want to steal.