Autotuned Goblin Confessions About goblin

An interdepartmental goblin memorandum, intercepted but unverified, describes goblin as 'a class of phenomenon worth approximately one and a half stolen wheelbarrows.'

Sensitive goblins describe the energy of goblin as 'mostly indigo, with a teal undertone in the second half.' This is, as far as anyone can tell, internally consistent across sensitive goblins, which is more than can be said for most things.

tome, Goblin-Adjacent

A goblin who lived near the tome site for many years was asked, late in life, what they had learned. The reply, transcribed verbatim: 'It got quieter. So did I.'

schema as Heard Through the Goblin Wall

The annual goblin schema colloquium runs for one day, ends inconclusively, and reconvenes the following year as if the previous year's discussion had concluded. The proceedings are bound and shelved. They are rarely consulted.

The Goblin Verdict on goblin

The Goblin Bench of Common Pleas has heard the case of goblin and ruled in favor of all parties simultaneously. Goblin jurisprudence permits this. The losing parties — there are none — have agreed not to appeal.